Coming home from college after your first semester is full of catching up on sleep, reconnecting with high school friends, and answering the dreaded “so…how is college?” question. To be perfectly honest, I dreaded this question for the longest time, for college hasn’t been anything like I thought it would be. In a lot of ways, my first few months at William and Mary have been amazing, and in other ways, they have challenged me in ways I didn’t think I could handle. Answering this loaded question can’t be done with a simple explanation, so I figured I’d come on here and write about it to try to put into words the craziness that has been the past four months of my life. Let’s go piece by piece.
Last year after the cross country season ended, my friends from school and I considered the idea of running a half marathon together. When we first talked about the idea of it, I was super excited. I love running long distances, and I thought that training for it together with some of my favorite people would be really enjoyable. However, senior year was SO busy, and since the only half marathon near us coincided with the spring track season, this dream of ours never came to fruition.
A little less than a year later, I joined my college’s running club (go blitz!!). Since everyone on this team is so wonderfully badass, it’s no surprise that as early as September, many members were talking about their plans to run the Richmond Half (and full) Marathon. As a newcomer, I didn’t know if I had what it took to run a whole 13.1 miles. My longest run up to that point was about 9 miles, but I hadn’t hit those distances in years. Still, I decided I would start training.
For weeks now, I have been looking forward to this moment. I am sitting in the window seat on my train home to Pennsylvania, listening to Allen stone, and doing one of my favorite things in the world: writing. Most people would think of a 7-hour trip home as exhausting and boring, but for me, these next 7 hours are going to be extremely therapeutic.
During my past month and a half at William and Mary, I haven’t had much time to write. Any free minute I got was spent either catching up on Dancing with the Stars or playing Heads Up with my hallmates, and I wasn’t able to dedicate a solid chunk of time to writing. I’m happy I was present in those moments, but holy moly, I really missed the feeling of spilling my heart out via keyboard.
While I’d love to outline all the crazy, amazing experiences I’ve had over the past few weeks, I’d rather save those stories for my in-person interactions with everyone from home. The one point I want to focus this post on is a theme that has been really prevalent in my past few weeks, and one that has made me have a bit of a paradigm shift: There isn’t enough time in college to mull over your emotions, and I can’t tell if that’s super healthy or super unhealthy.
Seniors, seniors, seniors. You have quite the year ahead of you. Finishing up your SAT’s, sending in those college applications, embarking on that fun senior trip (if your school is lucky enough to give you one), getting to slack off after AP exams. It’s a crazy year to say the least. Some say it’s the best year of high school, others say it doesn’t live up to the hype. That’s for you to figure out…but as I sit here waiting to move into my college dorm in just 4 short days, I figured I’d let you rising seniors in on some pieces of advice that I wish I heard as I prepared for year 12 of my education.
Like most girls, I grew out of my American Girl Doll phase at around age 10, and after that, my sweet little Rebecca Rubin had little purpose. However, one summer night a few years ago, I decided I would play with her once more. I began to rummage through her clothes basket and found all the outfits that I was once so obsessed with. I dressed her up in all of these outfits that night. Every single one. I tried a bunch of different hairstyles on her, and I read her some of the books that I “hand-made” for her back in the day. That night made me feel like a kid again, and now I have one of those nights at least once a year.
It’s a little tradition between Rebecca and I, and it’s usually something I do solely to feel like a kid again. Last night, however, honoring this tradition meant a little more than just jumping back into childhood for the night. Last night I realized how crucial she was to my growth all those years back.
A few weeks ago I saw someone post a poll on their Instagram story that said “does the summer in between high school and college feel weird?” I honestly don’t remember what the results of the poll were, but I remember feeling an immense sense of relief in knowing that I wasn’t the only one who felt a sense of uneasiness about this chapter of life we incoming freshmen are experiencing.
When Hurricane Sandy hit my area in 2012, every neighborhood except mine lost power. Some houses didn’t have power for over a week, but the lights in my house barely even flickered. That’s why when we lost power the other day during a storm, my family assumed it would be back within the hour. We were a wee bit wrong, and it didn’t come back until 24 hours later. This was my first real power outage, and even though dedicating a whole blog post to it seems a bit dramatic, the past day of my life has been really uncanny. Without trying to find too much deeper meaning behind it, I just wanted to talk about some of the weird events of the past 24 hours of my life.
In 24 hours, it’ll all be over. I will never write a DBQ again. I will never check the Home Access Center again. I will never make my daily walk from the loser lot to Mr. Murphy’s classroom for first period again. It’ll all be over, and I don’t know how I feel.
When I thought about graduation day in the past, I assumed I would be either very thrilled or super upset about leaving high school and moving forward. However, all I feel now is an uneasy feeling in my chest that I cannot fully put into words.
I’ve been a Jane the Virgin fan for years now, so when I heard that Justin Baldoni (Rafael on the show), Emily Baldoni (Justin’s wife), and Haley Lu Richardson (the fiancée of Brett Dier, who plays Michael on the show) were all part of a new movie coming out this spring, I knew I had to see it. Unfortunately, time got away from me, and I never got a chance to see it in theaters. But when it came out on itunes, I decided that Five Feet Apart was worth the 14.99 payment even though I’m the cheapest person I know.
I was in a happy, stable state of mind when I sat down to watch the film, so I expected that while it may make me tear up a little, the film wouldn’t make me full on cry. Boy, was I wrong.
How did I decide where to go to college? Good question- I don’t really know. I mean, I do know, but I don’t know how to tangibly explain it. So I suppose I’ll start from the beginning and hope that a somewhat comprehensible answer will come about.